Hop on the nostalgia train with me folks! We’re heading back to the ’90s and early 2000s when the kids were weird and the cartoons were weirder.
We watched a whole lot of television back in the day (we still do, but we used to, too). The animated shows and movies of our youth remain eternal classics in our hearts. They always will. But we have to revisit a few of them because there were definitely some jokes in these shows and movies…adult, dirty jokes…that flew over our heads when we were kids.
Only now, as full-grown, mature adults, can we fully appreciate the gross, hilarious humor of the sick minds we put in charge of entertaining us as kids.
Rocko as a “Specialty Phone Operator”
In one episode of Rocko’s Modern Life, Rocko is desperate for a job (we’ve all been there!), so he takes a gig as a “Specialty Phone Operator” (we have not all been there). The writing is on the wall…literally. That sign on the wall makes it quite clear that Rocko has taken a job as a phone sex operator. This show was on Nickelodeon!
Paper Towel Boy
In one scene in The Fairly OddParents, Timmy’s parents are watching a Dr. Phil-type show called Dr. Bill. Talking about children, Dr. Bill asks, “Do they use a lot of paper towels, spend too much time alone in their rooms, and say, ‘Don’t bother me!’?”
To which Timmy responds, “I’m just gonna take these paper towels up to my room alone, so don’t bother me.”
What was Timmy going to do alone in his bedroom with paper towels? I think you know.
Spongebob Watches Porn
In this clip, Spongebob is definitely watching porn, judging by how fast he changes the channel when Gary enters the room. How a sponge you know, does his business, I have no idea.
Speaking of Porn…
Grandpa Lou showed the babies the cover of his favorite movie, Lonely Space Vixens, which he’d watch after the kids went to bed. How old were you when you learned about your grandparents’ sexual fetishes?
The Time the Animaniacs Just Went for It
Yeah, uh, this really happened. On a kids’ show. Obviously, we didn’t get it back then, but boy oh boy, it’s a dirty joke!
We’re just getting started. Next up, Hey Arnold! and one very horny Ms. Helga Pataki…
Helga’s Sexual Awakening
We all remember that Helga had an unhealthy obsession with Arnold and his football head. She even had a shrine to him in her bedroom made entirely out of chewed bubble gum. It was not OK. But another thing that wasn’t OK was that time she was writing a love note to Arnold and she said he made her “girlhood tremble.”
That’s code for vagina.
I Know This Isn’t a Cartoon…
But this “hoe” joke was too good not to include.
What a naughty cat in a hat!
In The Chipmunk Adventure, the Chipettes sing a song called “Getting Lucky,” and even though they don’t expressly mention what the song is about, we all know!
Slap the Monkey
Again, Rocko’s Modern Life is back with the gross jokes. In this episode, they play a game called Slap the Monkey, which involves slapping a monkey on the behind. It could be a reference to the Peter Gabriel song, “Shock the Monkey,” but somehow, I don’t think so…
This scene in Powerpuff Girls is not for kids, especially not kids who didn’t understand what it meant to “be an accident” and had to ask their parents about it.
In the next one, teenagers get way suggestive…
Batman Went Beyond
This gem comes from Batman Beyond, a WB cartoon that lasted from 1999 to 2001. It was probably canceled because of this joke. Wowee!
Rocko’s Modern Boobs
This happened in an episode of Rocko’s Modern Life. Rocko got stuck, like for a while, in a giant woman’s boobs at the beach while he was trying to rub her with suntan lotion. Cool. Cool cool cool.
Um, Excuse Me?
This is a moment that actually happened in Rugrats. Obviously, Angelica is not doing what it looks like she’s doing, but come on people! There’s no way this wasn’t done on purpose.
This is another perfect moment from Rocko’s Modern Life that you’d miss if you blinked or if you were eight years old and didn’t realize Playboy was a thing yet.
Don’t click play on this video unless you want to see old Mrs. Finnster from Recess have…too good a time while riding on the janitor’s vacuum. Yeah. It’s not OK.
The punning is strong with our next joke…
Turns out Rocko’s Modern Life might have been the dirtiest show on television, and I watched the crap out of it as a kid! I definitely did not understand all the jokes in the show, and that’s probably good… Although now, I totally want to revisit it!
What what WHAT was Donald doing here?
This moment is even worse if you consider what actual duck penises are like.
Ren and Stimpy
OK, I take it back — Rocko’s Modern Life was gross, but Ren and Stimpy was so much worse. The only real memory I have of this show is watching an episode where Ren wakes up in the morning and his eyes are crusted shut with gross pus so badly that he can’t open his eyes. This show was bonkers.
The Road to HELLO!
This scene from The Road to El Dorado is notable because these two are definitely fooling around, and then she sits up abruptly, but it’s 100 percent clear that she was not at his face. They weren’t kissing.
Alice Was High
This isn’t a joke, per se, but in Alice in Wonderland, Alice is high out of her mind the whole time! This movie always gave me agita as a kid because it was so off-the-wall and Alice had no idea what was happening the whole time, and she was just floating through this scary fantasy world experiencing things she’d never experienced before and it was so scary.